Friday Funnies: ‘Cause It’s Time For A Little Music

I think it was one of those weeks that work to kick off a great Mother’s Day weekend:  Car Trouble Tuesday, Winless Wednesday Lotto, last Saturday threat of arrest. Yeah, this  > < close, but no cuffs after all. This Saturday will likely look slightly less dramatic. I say as I now scramble to find a piece of tree to knock on immediately.  Ah, it wasn’t that dramatic really. I was just exercising my right to protest the risks of permanently destroying the water around Vancouver with bitumen. All in a day’s work …

This brings us to Friday and you know what that means! I’m in the mood to hum …

We can all start with a full group guilty plea…

Oh sure, despite the obvious threat, no one offered to arrest this guy though

Summer PSA intermission

C’mon, sing it with me… Wo-oah…

This one’s for the Millennials. Whatcha gonna do with all that junk. All that junk inside your trunk

A moment of silence, please. Nah, just kiddin’ …  And them good ole boys were drinking whiskey and rye …Singin’ this’ll be the day that I die ….This’ll be the day that I die….

Small dogs. …Amirite?  Arrest it!

….Na na na na na na na na na na naaaaaaaaaaa…. Oh nooooo…….

This is why summer PSAs are necessary

Well, you knew we had to address the elephant in the room eventually…

Mm hmm. Yep.

And now, at least two of those tunes will stick with you for the rest of the day. Have a fab weekend, and a Happy Mother’s Day – in solidarity  … or solitary. Up to you, really.

RL

Friday Funnies: ‘Cause 5 Years of Blogging Bliss on Saturday

Hey, my 20 or so readers – can you believe I’ve been at this for 5 years already?! (Still?) Technically, the anniversary is tomorrow, March 17th, but Friday funnies…

I think this is supposed to be one of those milestones that beg for a little reflection with the gratitude for still playing in this sandbox. It’s true that I have come through a long meandering road to narrow the ‘topic tabs’ of my preferences. My original journal notes on life became the need to speak out for decency & fairness. To work in the best of hopes to elevate life for the marginalized & abused. Of course, even that isn’t much of a stretch when, as an Indigenous person, you’re speaking for one’s own relations for the most part.

I’ve also received an incredibly intense education over these years as I delved into the meat of the issues for the Indigenous. I believe many of you have shared those eye-opening lessons and I thank you, so very much, for your support and encouragement in that especially.

I’ve also learned you also don’t mind when I veer off into my other passions of sanity controls – poetry and eye-rolling humour. Without a doubt, I’m grateful to my following for your awesome prop-ups overall. So there, 5 years along, time to head into some lightness of being…

Solid medical opinion

2018… amirite?

Wait’ll they see her sidle up to them wearing a shark fin. Smile!

This completes the PSA obligation

Seems like this would be an end of the week job…like the end of a very long week – fortified with a lotta gin.

Oh, you know more than a few of us own these pants!

Let the birds speak their causes… you can always eat them after.

Ha ha, made you look…

 

Nostalgia hit… Just let it carry you back to Grade 1….

When you have teddy bear separation anxiety. It’s a thing! Or, it could be…

Much like my dignity after stooping to this level for my 5th Anniversary post…

Have a fab weekend, I predict a lot of green in various futures. Cheers – and thank you, again!

RL

Friday Funnies: ‘Cause … 2018, Sigh

So, 2.5 weeks into 2018.  I don’t even have to say anything about the new year landscape, do I? This is why I figure I’ll just do a nice, little detour to distraction today. You with me?

Yeah, let’s escape like crazy into this mad weaving of 10 mostly stolen memes & wisdom. Yes, I do – I live on the edge like that…

thrills

I know Canada peeps know this rite of passage… and it didn’t kill ya either.

Canada is getting all kinds of coooll in 2018

So glad that resolutions thing is out of the way!

See, if you work real hard and just apply yourself…

When you commit to your ‘spirit animal’, but she dinna want you.

26239457_10211073937312587_8830446752676027136_n

………….…Prunes only love you when they’re dryin’…………..(Feetwould Mak)

No one. We met the President today.

We now pause for this quick PSA…

Growth chart

I’m tracking my debt-load in the exact same way

Tipping a feather to the cuzzins…

I’ll go ahead and take that last word, Alex…

My wisdom wins

 

Thanks for dropping by. Grab yourself a big plate of the most distracted weekend ever.

RL

WANING TREASURES: Colour

The diminishing days of summer begin to tug at my only-just-now-relaxing heartstrings. I’m not ready to give up the heat, the light, the energy of the extra sunlight; not where we live anyway.

We live in a rain-forest and not the kind that, in winter, envelopes the area in near bathwater-warm mists.  Oh no, ours is that infamous, sopping, bitterly chill ya to cellular level till you cry kind of dampness. That cheery fun matched only by the varying depths of blanketing grey masses that blot out said light of grace.

So, is it any wonder I choose to claw back the impending doom and seek out the remnants of brilliance and shine? To hang onto the trailing sweet scents of fresh leaves and grasses and florals? To seek even more comfort in the flowing lightness of shimmery breezes (and really cute apparel)?

All of which serves to ease even the biggest workload into a sense of partial vacation. Maybe it’s closer to the idea of just vacant, but still… if it works for escapism purposes…

Soon enough, the world’s turn will darken patio libations and I will have no choice but to submit to the inevitable. Grey. Slate, Dove, Ash, Charcoal. Grey. Well, at least that is, until we get to the mixed and even, garish jewel tones of Christmas. Oh my… Can’t wait!

In the meantime, some of my micro-tributes to summer colour:

DAISY CLAIMS
Daisies

Momma’s favourites
White blooms speaking innocence
Thus mine are yellow 😄

Haiku
BC coast, July 2017

 

HIDDEN TREASURES

Secrets of the heart
A mere two souls know my fave
Primary option

Haiku
Photo, Peggys Cove, NS

 

JAUNE SEDUCTIONS

Sunny, bright, happy
Deep, warm, inviting caress
Golden embraces

A bed of warm intellect
The real couleur de l’amour

Haiku / Tanka
Photo, Northwest Cove, NS

RL

Street Art Takes Pain

I came across a pretty great poetic thought on Twitter, and be damned if I could find it again to properly quote and credit it, but it said something along the line of, “poetry is where the pain goes”.  I’d wager there’s a pretty big crowd of us that wade in that poetic pool.

I’m not saying I had a painful week, but once again inspiration hit while I was perusing a friend’s street art photos.  Some old heart matters reared up, and I couldn’t resist the pull of the bard. So a short ode to a long week. Wishing all a really fabulous final August weekend.

WITH BAITED BREATH

Help, help she called out
Alas, only silence heard
No hook on the line

Haiku
Street Art photo provided by @createdbyw

 

DOG COLLARS

When the deeds been done
The new victim acquiesced
Signed on for the ride

Oh, the glee, oh if only
Oh, to be flies on the wall

Haiku / Tanka
Street Art photo provided by @createdbyw

 

HARE OF THE DOG

Oh, soul Girl, step slow
Do beware red hearts, Alice
Their souls are so black

Tread most carefully, angel
Every promise, a trick

Haiku / Tanka
Street Art Photo: Unknown, Porto, Portugal

RL

ICYMI: That Time I Was a Goat Herder

What a month, eh? So much padded wall-level induced activity all around, I know I feel like a bumper car in a maddening institution. Except every bounce-back is a welcome push to a new direction, destination be damned. Speaking of new directions, last year I thought I’d give that a whirl – at least in theory. I decided I would change my outlook and profession toward something more collective, so to speak. That’s right – goat herding.

So, OK, I wasn’t really a goat herder. At least not in the literal sense. It was just a little fun I had with Linkedin.  If you don’t know what Linkedin is, well apparently, neither do a lot of the people who actually use it.

How do I know that? Well, because once in a while I like to test the efficacy of certain operating procedures in my world. This time I wondered about the notifications effectiveness on Linkedin, so I made a couple of changes to my profile.  I changed my name to Shelley Miller and I ramped up my rather average marketing title to ‘Goat Herder’.  I also changed my location to Montana for good measure and then I kept that profile up for two weeks.

Goater herder MONTANA

Do you know what kind of response I got to all these changes in my life? Nothing. Nada. Not even a blip on any social media radar. Is it me? Apparently I have to really, really up my game in business social media

Why not? Apparently I can be anything I want on Linkedin anyway. I’m seriously considering ‘Fire Hula Hooping Rocket Scientist’, tagline: “We light the fire under your landing pads”!

Maybe it’s better to leave plain marketing as is and turn to Memey Vice. Let’s face it, this post has gone to the dogs anyway and what the hell, let’s stick some goats in while we’re at it.

Reason has its moments… Guess which one works for Linkedin?

Well played sharon don't underestimate a woman dogDon’t ever underestimate a sheep or goat-herding woman, dog… Just sayin’.

Hold your horses, the goats are coming…

goat kid naps

 

OK… never mind…

… and I’ll just be on my way…

Even nature becomes one with nature.  It’s a thing.

OK, OK, I’m going, I’m going..

Who knew goats could be so baa-ad ass?

Oh man, that’s cold.  … Well, excuse me… at least I goat the last word…

Have an awesome weekend, all.  See ya when I see ya.

RL

 

Killer Words 2

Mighty Pen2

The best weaponry
To slay thy enemies well
Ubiquitous BICs

RL

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/paragon/
#Haiku, #Micropoetry #powerofthewrittenword
Image craft by RL

Friday Funnies – ‘Cause, I Had to Put ‘Something’ Together

I didn’t get a ha-ha in for March or April? Wow, time flies in these box loads of crazy that’s passing for life lately. Kinda makes a girl feel like throwing in the towel on societal issues, humanity issues and all ‘Home & Garden’ issues really. I know I’m not the only one dealing with the feeling of falling behind or down and dammit, with nary a drop of liquor involved.

So the very least we could do (literally) is, sit back on someone else’s funny bone and catch a breather. (Don’t go there, Randall).  Therefore, in deference to our victory over low bars; in indulging the least we can do, let’s look and learn from some commiseration of our uh, win.

Not even kidding. Every Jehovah’s Witness or girl scout offers to call the police every time they come to my door

Clearly, Frank is on top of the yard work. Suck it, Bob.

Need more glue on the yellow line…

That’s some top notch ‘screw it’, right there…

I’m not sure I’d even count the bracelet as one of the three… just sayin’

Some things are best left unsaid… (by me, I’d love to hear what you’d say!)

Yeah,  maybe it’s time to turn it all over to the animals. We can always count on them to add the sweetness factor…

It might take a minute

And for a stand alone project:

That’s it for this week or until the whirlwinds of ‘are you kidding me’ politics, personal duties, and community expectations settle down – hahahaha… Just kidding, that never happens – and y’all know it. We’re in this sin wagon together…

Here’s to an easy weekend and if not, at least settle for yard work at Frank’s level.

RL

First Blog Resulted in 3 Unbelievable Opportunities!

Four years today… Blog Womaning bliss! The outlet for personal record became a portal of learning, teaching opportunities and making contact with the some of the greatest examples of human decency – and well, admittedly, an occasional dip toward the lowest. Luckily, those are very few, kind of like that deal I got to mull over not long after my first post back then…

teacher blackboard green irishI was really quite flattered when after I published my first blog, I received some attention from a fellow blogger with a message to follow his blog too.  I looked at his page and saw it was very well done. Quite sophisticated and up to date with all kinds of interesting media to flip through.  I liked, as in appreciated the post that was at the top of his published works. Nicely written, inspirational. Even more impressive was how young he was.  So, I hit the like button and even clicked on the blog ‘follow’ button.

Not long after, I started receiving inspirational emails from him that included ideas on changing my life, by changing my financial circumstances, by learning a really, super cool way to earn a living via my blog!  This guy did it and look, he’s only 18 yrs old and already retired in the Thai jungle of his retirement dreams – as demonstrated in his selfie-video telling me so.

The promo soundbites were right up my marketing background alley; though slight, the description sounded reasonable and plausible.  So, I followed the links as directed and got to a 45 minute video of two guys sitting casually in elegant chairs in front of a beautiful interior pool of an obviously expensive house.  My spidey senses began to web-out.

The guys opened their pitch with their personal histories and like young blog guy, they described their beginnings from nothing, with little prospects.  One had actually lived out of a van that cost less than the pen he was holding in his hand.  It was a pretty good looking pen.

The beautiful house was also his, and we wouldn’t believe that all he has now, was achieved after figuring out – are you ready for this – a simple, 3 step idea for making millions via the internet.

About 20 minutes into alternating the talk between how really hard life had been for them, yet so drastically changed with little effort into the still unexplained way they did it, another screen flashed up under their picture.  If I act now, for only $25, I will learn (finally) the secret 3 step plan for making millions – or as much as I am willing to work for, it’s all up to me – but I better hurry because there are limited spots left.  Ugh! Gut instinct confirmed, video turned off.

Pffftt! The not so secret ‘secret’ was revealed; original flattery flattened, thrill about having blog skillz fizzled. Hell, maybe I even did miss an opportunity to ‘retire at 18’, but I trusted my gut and I’m sure I’m richer from not doling out those bucks.

What this did do, was get me thinking about all these pyramid or multi-level marketing schemes that come up over and over. Sometimes they provide genuine product offerings, but mostly they’re about the quickest immediate cash grab for the idea guys.

I can’t begin to count how many of these pitches/ads/infomercials I’ve seen and you know what they all have in common?  Vans.  Ever notice that too?  Almost every one of these self-made from dirt poor guys who luck-out on the answer to millions, start out by living in vans.  Really shaky rickety vans too.

I’m re-thinking plans for my son’s formal education after high school.  I’m going to just shove him into a van when he’s 18 and say, “Go forth, my son, and prosper”!  Bring me back one of those great-looking pens when you’ve made it.

This lit up the third idea bulb – I’m going into the old van selling business.  Low overhead; at near break-down level anyway. We’ll sell ’em to these young guys who’ll eventually get rich. Win-win. Whose in? Time limited offer. Oh, and my son gets his half-price.

Top of the marnin’ ta ya, (sorry about that)

…and a round of green full-bodied gratitude with a heady froth of love for these awesome folks, each a very fine mug-O’-talent; thanks for the ongoing support and friendship over these years…

Cheers,
Ned Hickson
Le Drake Noir
Robert Hookey
Trent’s World
Joanne at My Life Lived Full
Lynne at Life After 50
Jill’s Scene
Dan Antion
Randall Willis

RL

Friday Funnies; ‘Cause We Took a Vote and the Electoral Meme College Carried It

So, so many memes, so, so little time…

Hey look, we survived the overwhelming jolly, holly season, the January blues, the February blahs and election seasons that never seem to end even when they’re like, finished – officially and everything… So sometimes we get to kick back and revel in a little super lazy; it’s like normal lazy, but we’re wearing a cape. Just another super power to revel in.  OK then, let’s go! What’s in the wind this week?  Saddle up!

ranch-dressing

Yippee ky Aaaaaa… giddy up there,         ranch dude.

Wheeeeeeee... when you really wanna keep the kids quiet. What? Too dark?

Wheeeeeeee… when you really wanna keep the kids quiet. What? Too dark?

surprised-cat-3

OK then, moving on…

Oh com'n... look for it

Oh com’n… look for it.  My ex’s twin.

Send for the full instruction video for only $29.95, S&H extra.

Send for the full instruction video for only $29.95, Genuine NRA approved     S&H extra.

spiders

I love spunk! Don’t we all love spunk? Someone give him a little pat…

sup

Fair number of us see similar when we turn on the bedside lamp.

this-is-angry

Yeah, that’s some real Hulk skillz right there.

testing-lab

Yeah, I generally throw in a PSA about here. Be safe out there, kids.

Oh, WTH, we'll give you 2 PSAs this month...

Oh, WTH, nothing wrong with throwing in a helpful hint too.

sleeping

Wild life game park safari

Continuing the wild life safari...

You should see them rev up during mating season…

And the reason we've reached this level of lackadaisical journalistic effort...

…And the reason we’ve reached this level of lackadaisical journalistic effort…

Sigh…

That’s it for this week and in all honesty I’m not sure what’s in store next. I have no idea whether I’ll be back to railing at politics, detailing social issues, or releasing steam through haikus. So, like the tagline implies, come back for what you think you’re gonna get, stay for the surprise!

Have an awesome weekend!

RL