Speaking softly with a false stick really effing hurts.
“Love you, miss you, I care, I’m listening, you matter”.
You matter, until what?
How is it that the very people who labor to use the power of words to sear their literary brilliance into the soul of another, often quite successfully, easily turn around in utter ignorance that their works of off-handed effort can also be taken to heart by anyone?
I love you; I miss you; I care about you; I’m listening; you are so special to me; I’d do anything for you; you matter.
I see these words used regularly, ‘normally’, by many in the world of blogs, story comments, Facebook notes, Twitter love, in reply to their readers – certainly not all writers, but enough to see the consequences often enough.
I see how these words and phrases are used and it has come to drive me up the literary wall of frustration – and beyond the heart-break indignation sometimes expressed. It’s especially galling where the users are writers by profession or regularity in pastime. They should know about ‘the power of words’ better than anyone. They should be the ones defending the power of language.
Those who explain away those usages as just throw-away lines in the heat of their emotions or from the pinnacle of whatever uncontrolled enthusiasm have somehow managed to become some of the most clueless centers of their earth(ly selves).
Those sort of throw-away lines are not harmless whether they are tossed around in obliviousness or deliberately lobbed. To the uninitiated, they are bombs of hope or heartache. Some might say it’s one’s own choice in how to react, but I wonder…. who gets to decide that they get to be the testers of merit?
Readers are not just recipients of thoughts, they are real people who believe in words, who respect words, and yes, mostly they realize the power of words. They know words matter.
Our words are not just for titillation, or for creating magnetism to draw appreciation, adoration and viewing hits. The power of words is always about touching views, inner sight, hearts, and souls.
The irresponsible use them to assuage their ego-based itches and cuts. This level of self-service is fucking mind boggling (pardon my French, it’s Canadian, eh). (Sorry, France).
I have to ask, where is the honest to God respect for the power of words? Unless being a charlatan is the norm, since when should anyone, that you really don’t know, take for granted that words such as ‘I love you’ or ‘you matter’ or even ‘fuck off’ are a throw-away line of the most minimal meaning possible
Where’s the awareness of why one is doing whatever it is one is doing? It doesn’t take a great deal of effort to sit for a minute to ask, why am I going to do this or why does this matter?
Say what you mean and mean what you say – learned by many and usually the hard way, but oh, so worth the earn.
I know I reflected when I finished this post. My answer was, I do not understand why there is such emptiness coming from people who work so hard to carve out some attention to their views, and damn it all, I really enjoy a good rant now and then too.
RL
Blog Woman!!! - Life Uncategorized 
With great blog, comes great responsibility, Robyn.
Always.
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And you have always demonstrated that, Robert. It’s one of the reasons I have always appreciated and respected your work and your views. Also, you’re pretty damn easy to like too…
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It’s a curse…
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It’s easy to get careless with words, particularly in comments when we tend to move quickly if we’re reading a bunch of blogs. Good advice.
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Thanks, Dan, and you are so right. I do like to respond to people who take the time and effort to read my stuff, but I’ve had to reply to people who didn’t understand my original reply point.
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Oh, it sounds like you’ve been hurt, my friend. I’m so sorry! As I always say, “Your Mama lied…words CAN hurt you.” 😦
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Thanks, Rachel, I have had a moment or two of “huh”?, but this one is about someone who was really devastated in addition to other comments I have read over the last year.
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Oh, no! 😦 That sucks! If I can help, let me know.
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Well now – no doubt you feel much better after that little rant. ha! I know I do. It is very true Robyn, many use words without even a nod to whether they are true or not – they are used solely to achieve a target or with an ulterior motive. To me it is the same as situational ethics – eventually it returns contradictory answers. We have to use words and ideas to maximize the expression of truth as far as we know it. Even Jesus addressed this : Let your Yes be yes and your No be No.
I have always marveled at how many use words so cheaply for their own ends. It has never worked for me and I stay away from those who do it.
Great post Robyn. Thank You.
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You – are always at the top of the very best discourse – that should go without saying, but I will anyway, because I am so grateful for your company.
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You bring up quite a valid point. There are some of my readers I genuinely tell I love and miss them but some of those same people are people I’ve known for years, and some outside of my blog/the blogosphere/or even the internet. In a way it’s like we can’t fix all the wrongs of the world, but we feel compelled to send some form of support anyway.
It may not seem like much but it’s something. It keeps some people going. I’ve seen it in action.
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Thank you – for your thoughtfulness. I’ve been far more lucky than not, in meeting the most wonderful people in the blogosphere, including in ‘real’ life. It could be that those who speak genuinely, meet genuine-minded people. Thanks again, I enjoyed your comment.
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I think so. 😀
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After last week don’t I know it.
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Damn it all! You write so beautifully. Even in a rant you have absolute command of your words, the language. You proved your point of the power and influence of words with your diction.
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Well, thank you, Mel, so much, and let me remind that I have 2 years of your words inscribed across my heartstrings. You’ve inspired me, in more ways than words and I hope you know that.
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Thank you Robyn. That means so much to me. 🙂 It goes both ways…I’m grateful for your words, and how eloquently you use them.
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I often wonder at how the quest for page views can lead to incendiary headlines or not even incendiary but where getting the eyeballs is the goal more than telling the story. Words matter. So true.
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That’s another great point, and likely valuable enough for a full post. I’d love to see you draw that out sometime. Thanks, Diahann.
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Hi Robyn,
Your timing on this is perfect. I often find myself using the “same” words or phrases to respond to writers and I worry, “Does this sound insincere? Do I really “LOVE” this/them? Do my words even mean anything anymore?”
As always, you make me think in the best of ways.
And sincerely? I would LOVE to meet you…for real…someday 🙂
Michelle
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Well, if I told you how much I absolutely enjoy reading your comments and thoughts, would you believe me? ‘Cause I do, along with your own musings when you post them. Definitely count me in on the MMT fan train of people I’d like to meet too. 🙂
Thanks so much, again, Michelle.
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